Self Image - Tips to Create and Keep a Positive One!

How do we create a positive self image?

Its hard to do when we are barraged with negative influences and comments that generate negative feelings that we internalize.

The image we have of ourselves is a direct reflection of what we think about ourselves. It can be either positive or negative or somewhere in the gray matter that lies between the two.


What we think about ourselves is also a result of the ways we are treated by others. Do people in your life build you up or tear you down? What we take from those experiences either help us or hinder us.

How to Create a Positive Self

  • Tune out negatives? Blah, blah, blah. Hard to do sometimes, ya know? (You must always wear your headphones to do this.)

  • Grin and bear it?? There’s gotta be a better way!

  • Take One Day at a Time? I’ve had many days where I had to take on hour/minute/second at a time and have the wrinkles to prove it. (well, only a few:o)

    I have been down in the dirt so many times in my life, I should've been a farmer! How about you? Each time I've picked myself up, brushed off the dirt, and slowly gotten back on my feet. Each time I found it a bit harder to do, but it is something to strive towards and it is doable. No matter what your age, you can find the personal power and strength you need to get through it. But how?

    How To improve Your Self Image


    (And turn OFF negative influences?)

    1) Get Past the Moment!

    Nothing BAD lasts forever, and remembering this is KEY to getting through tough times and tough emotions. Moments pass. Get thru them. The key is to keep trucking. Move toward positive self image, if it’s only in baby steps and nanoseconds.

    2) Surround Yourself with Positive People

    I know it’s impossible to get away from some jerks or nimrods who haven’t got a clue. (Ya know, those people who influence your life negatively.) This is especially true if you are married to one, or have one as your mother in law*&!@#%^

    You can however control the way you react to them AND the things in them that invoke a negative response from you.

    For example, lets say your husband comes home everyday and doesn’t do anything to help you, the wife, when he gets there. And then he calls you a ‘nag’ when you suggest that he do something! (Lets say that the grass needs mowing.)

    Instead of keep nagging him, you might try meeting him at the door after work with his favorite beverage, taking his work hat for him, and making sure he rests comfortably in front of the TV for a while, without your interference.

    After a while go back in and tell him that the neighbors grass is making your yard look bad and since it needs doing, you’re gonna go ‘try to cut the grass' yourself.

    There is no better way to get a man to move than to suggest you are gonna do 'his job' for him. (If he’s the manly man type~) If that doesn’t work then think of other approaches. There is more than one way to accomplish stuff and skin a rabbit!

    Get creative in the way you handle people and you will control the amount of negative you receive from them. Help mold a good self image from the outside and the inside!

    3) The Struggle Within!

    You can’t be truly happy with yourself unless you live your values. What you value in life is important in the way you treat yourself and others. If you don't live according to your own values, you will internalize the guilt you feel for not living them and your self image will diminish. You can’t be happy with you unless you live the way you think you should.

    4) Be Happy, Don’t Worry~

    Be hap hap happy as much of the time as possible. (Hard to do with so much bad news all the time I know.) However, singing, humming, and whistling are three ways I know to ‘get happy’. My father always told me he could tell when I was happy. I said ‘how dad?’ and he said ‘I know you’re happy when I hear you whistle Carolyn.’

    This is TRUE. Something about these things will help you get happy! If whistling doesn’t do it for you, ask your mom and dad what you used to do as a kid to let them know you were happy. Chances are there is something you used to do that you’ve forgotten about that will help you ‘get happy’.

    And when you are happy, you feel good. When you feel good, you look good! When you look good, you have better self image.

    5) Every Good Boy/Girl Deserves Favor

    When you do a ‘good deed’, it will come back to you either three or sometimes seven fold. Helping other people is one of the all time best ways to help you feel good about you. Your self image will soar when you help someone whose in need.

    6) Get Rid of Extra Baggage

    Shed those extra pounds that weigh you down. Lose weight and you will feel great and you will feel good. When you feel good, you look good. When you look good, you feel good!

    7) Take Care of Ye Self

    Its hard sometimes to take good care of you, but it is IMPERATIVE if you want a good positive self image. If you don’t take care of you, then whose gonna? Practice self love and love yourself enough to do a few nice things for you DAILY. Something as simple as shaving your legs or face:o) is good practice. Everyday I make sure I have time for me, even if it’s only 10 minutes on the treadmill , coloring my hair, or fixing a nice dinner. Make sure to recognize your own self worth and self image daily.

    8) Take Ten or Twenty (And not extra cookies!)

    Exercise is a great way to make you feel good. Its hard some days getting going and getting around to it though. If you can’t exercise daily, then be sure to get some exercise a few times a week. Be creative about it too.

    When you exercise you release natural feel good endorphins in your body. You can’t help but feel good~ You have NO choice and that’s a good thing~

    9) You Are What You Eat!

    Wholesome foods are natural feel good foods. When you feel good after a good meal, you generate positive feelings within. Get off of junk food that has no nutritional value. The best way to do that is DON’T BUY IT. Don’t keep it in your house.

    You will not feel good about yourself if you continually eat junk food. Want positives? Then keep away from the negatives. Junk food is a negative and will only hinder a positive self image.

    10) Forget It and Get Past It!

    If outside influences make you feel bad about yourself, FORGET THEM AND GET PAST THEM. Refuse to ‘take it with you’. I’ve been in relationships that have made me feel as small as a grain of sand on the beach. I moved away from those relationships and so can you. It may take time and planning and carefully orchestrated thoughts, but it is possible to do.

    I stopped hanging out at the beach many years ago. One reason I stopped going was that I wanted to stop drinking beer for a while. I had to remove myself from bars and other negative influences that would try to coerce me to 'have a few'. I hated giving up my friends but they were all clearly part of a negative influence on me at that time. I wanted to get past the party time in my life and make something more for me. I was trying to create a different self image.

    Self image is like a picture on the wall that you have to draw. Draw an image you like! Create the person you deserve to be. If you aren’t doing something right, then find out how, try something different, but do something!

    Change doesn’t happen by itself. You gotta wanna. Be creative and let your imagination flow. We have but a short time on this earth and it would be such a sad event if you weren’t here to enjoy it with me!





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